So I’m Publically Retching…..So Vhaatt!

December 28, 2011

  A New Year is coming, I think a little pre-retching is called for. I’m gonna’ sit while I stand on me box if you don’t mind…

I spent a train ride today trying to hold back tears over how grateful I feel for who I am and where I am  now, and for the courage, ability & most importantly the support to, simply put, pursue whatever, which just so happens to be my destiny. But above all, I’m grateful because I know what’s in store for me. I can FEEL it and it’s goosebump and tear inducing, as it is greater than me.

I mainly wrote this to alleviate some pressure and also because I have some friends & family, who like me, are working to manifest this feeling this gift, with honor, dedication, integrity, goodness and solid, honest hard work. Together we have to work every day in believing and acting solely upon the rhythm of a feeling, ignoring our minds fragmented limited perception of “reality,”and “boldy go where no man has gone before.” (Yes I stole a line from Jean Luc Picard..yes from STAR TREK…so vhatt!) It’s going to be a New Year, so lets get inspired, shall we!

So here’s my internal contemplation expounded & painted in letters:

(Inner voice..Ehe eh ehem!)

 Man, you better do EVERYTHING YOU CAN and then some to become what you are meant to BECOME, and once you do, let good be not good enough, be GREAT! And then OOOZZE your GREATNESS on to every walk of life you come across and even those you may never meet. And never mind the naysayers including yourself sometimes; they/you are only afraid of greatness. If you want to hear something moving, change the channel and dance to the beat of your own soul. There is no tomorrow, there’s right now and that’s all that exist, RIGHT NOW, DO it Now, FEEL it now, THINK it now,  and most importantly BELIEVE  it now. Do EVERYTHING YOU CAN TO BELIEVE IN YOU RIGHT NOW. Do not wish for it or hope for it, you don’t have to, IT ALREADY EXISTS INSIDE OF YOU.  It is kinetically bustling in you, above you, around you; the world breathes in and out in anticipation for you to soar. This kind of power was not meant to be contained but UNFOLDED, EXPLODED, SCREAMED and TRANSMITTED via SELFLESS INFECTIOUS pathways that leave the world a little or a lot better than it was before you came. Mediocrity is not comfortable; mediocrity is the break that leads to the death of an infinitely expanding soul. Do the best you can and when you feel you can’t, take a breather, a kindergarden drink milk and eat cookies just because breather, and then start again and do the best you can.

 I ask to not be taken from this feeling filled place, no matter how painful it may seem at times in my misinterpretation of events, but for the courage to transfix the world with my brilliant, noble, gracious and honorable gifts.

When in doubt DECLARE to yourself & to the world:

 It’s done, even bigger & better than I imagined, It’s done. As I believe it, as I picture it, in all its beauty and graceful perfection and splendor, it’s done!   I am grateful for the undulating waves that I brave every day, as I become one wave closer to the palpable manifestation of my prodigiousness.

…..and then just take a breath, smile & relax in the grate/gracefulness of KNOWING.


NOw Raise your glasses…..ok well since it’s not New Years quite yet, maybe just raise the nearest item next to you…yessss a pencil will have to suffice.

To: My bud bud & Professional Athlete Melanie Hardy- It’s DONE….YOU HAVE ALREADY QUALIFIED FOR 2012 IN THE 800 & YOU ARE ONE OF THE TOP RUNNERS IN THE WORLD. You work so hard and deserve the best. Your light shines, you can and will  feel it and others are warmed by your glow….oh and um you did it all with a funky too cool for school hairdo. I  dear say the mohawk is gonna’ see a comeback after this Summer Olympics. 😉

To: Estrella,  your ‘simply marrrveelous darling’ fashion company, BerqclÉ LLC “It’s a household name.” (Forrest Gump …Oh soo wiseeee:) You inspire me. And yes, EVERYTHING you have worked for and then some is a comin’ so brace yeself wee laddie’.

To: My wonderful parents,  supportive siblings(cespes-patcat), ENMA (Starpar, Alpalzi- Epitome of Man’ & Nolpolzi -my partner in crime;), my cousin JBaxter (it just doesn’t get any  better than you!), Juanee Cilliers(see you on the track at this Summer Olympics:), Jessica Branker(Olympics opening ceremony crazyness Oh and Viva Mexico!:),MacKenzie Hill, Greg Nixon, Mr. Comissiong, past coaches Harley Cooper, Dave Rodda, Wayne(from health to hippie), current coache & track wizard Darrell Smith, musical poet Frank the Bodega Man, close friends, random friends and my London Crew (Stephen Burgoyne…Stepho my love, Lady Fiona, Andre Shiiii ;), Amina, Robin, Sir Simon) and my weekly unplanned “random” encounters with some of the awesome blossom (it rhymes leave it alone haha) people the world has to offer.

And finally…

To: The BELIEVER, DOERS , SUPPORTERS, MOVERS & CORE SHAKERS out there! Here’s to you, here’s to us!

A New Year is a great excuse to begin to do what you ought to be doing!

Retching complete.

Happy (a few days before) NEW YEAR!!!

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